Patrick A

First off, I'm physically OK, just shaken. Just popped a Guinness...

Well, I never thought this would happen. I had been home for work about an hour and decided I'd better run up to the LBS for some Mr Tuffy's and tubes. No problem, short ride, kind of nice. Luckily, I wasn't loaded down with gear for a commute. So I got to within a block of my house and I'm approaching an intersection, a stop sign. These are low speed residential type of streets...This car coming the opposite direction gets to the stop sign first, no problem because I'm about mid block. And then I got the strangest sensation...I knew he was going to gun it for me. I just ******* new it. As the car went through the intersection he started wandering over - and then he gunned it! Because I had that weird anticipation I had already mapped my "escape" in a split second...It was a car load of what seemed like kids, I couldn't believe they were trying to do this to me! It happened so fast, but I felt awash in fear - and then anger. I gathered up all my energy as best I could and coiled up on the bike...as they got to me I sprung off the bike and grabbed it by the mid tube and flung it as hard as I could as I was flying through the air – second baseman double play style. I wasn't sure if I was going to clear them, so at the last second I extended my arm as far as possible and flipped them a big ole bird! If I was going to get run down by some punk, it was going to happen with a big F YOU on my behalf! It was a blur after that, it seemed like I was airborne for minutes, I actually saw a portion of the car pass below me. I landed in someone's yard right on my ass and right next to my bike. There was a guy on his front porch, and he was already on the phone with the police. He came down and was like "that was some crazy Matrix like sh1t there man!" I guess my contortioning rated a 9.5 on the Keaneu meter to this guy. My shoulder felt a little cranked form hurtling the bike, but other than that I was OK. I also called the police and filed another report, too. I hope they find those sons of *****es so they don't kill somebody!

Anyway, I was kinda freaked out and typing that all out helped settle me considerably. Be safe everybody!

Jean Beetham Smith 

Scary. Keep in tune to your intuition, it seems very accurate and definately worth cultivating. Hate to say it, but car-loads of kids will do all sorts of weird stuff that none of them would do on their own and you do have to watch out for them.

WHO

WTF?! Dude, I had cars trying to scare me by passing really fast and close, or at worse try to clip me, but literally trying to hit straight on a bicycle is really lame. Plus, that would leave obvious proofs(dents, blood, etc) on the car for the police to spot.

They must've been high on some new drug or something...
That's unbeleivable...

timmhaan

well, i guess you deserve that guinness! crazy story - glad you're okay for the most part. that's cool that the other guy was calling the police though, i'm sure he'll be a good witness if it comes down to that.

seely

Dude I had almost the same thing happen to me today!! Must be a full moon?

I was coming home from work, was in the right lane making a right on the green arrow, when all the sudden a GTI in the left lane swerves into the right just as I am entering the intersection. Comes VERY close to hitting me, but no big deal yet. I then make my right, which is into a very poor section of road on a one lane hill. I always ride in the center due to the bottomless potholes on my right. This GTI flies up behind me and sits there revving his engine. Just as I move right (as soon as I possbly could), he SWERVES into me pressing me to the curb as he revs it flying past me. In disbelief I raise my finger and give him the "one way to Jesus" salute. Takes him a minute but he slams his brakes on, and when I catch up to him he pushes me into the curb. I was gonna bunnyhop onto the sidewalk but I was so irate I was gonna stick around for this one. The guy is about 30, 220lbs, and looks like he should be in a Whitesnake cover band. Asks me if I want to flick him off again, so I ask him if he wants to try running me over again.

He starts to get out of the car and I tell him if that door opens then I'm through being peaceful about it and that I have no hesitation calling the police and filing assault charges... this slows him down as it sinks into his cranium... he then informs me that I shouldn't be in the middle of the road... I ask him if he goes around potholes in his car, and he doesn't say anything because he knows where this is going... I then ask him to think about going over those same potholes on a tire thats maybe an inch wide. He then tells me to to go procreate with myself, to which I reply that being the expert he'd have to show me how thats done. His girlfriend/wife/whatever was trying very hard to keep a straight face on that one. Anyways he then burned rubber and took off.

Bottom line I shouldn't have reacted like I did but gee golly was I mad.

Dchiefransom

You answered your own question when you said it looked like kids. We had a some guys in a car try to run over a mail carrier legally crossing the street, and the police didn't do anything because the kids said they were just trying to "scare" him, not actually hit him. USPS didn't press for charges to be filed.

Chris L

I've said it before and I'll say it again. Kids should not be eligible to drive, period.

However, I have to say the saddest part about all this is that it doesn't really surprise me all that much. In fact, I had some jerk try to run me over in Surfers Paradise about three weeks ago. They were coming the other way on the opposite side of the street, turned their headlights off (it was dark at the time) and aimed right at me. I saw them coming and slammed on the brakes with maybe half a second to spare. Unfortunately, the fact they had no lights at night meant I couldn't see their number plate.

I have, in the last two years, reported at least two drivers who deliberately tried to pull this trick on me. Then there was that jerk in 2001 who ran a red light, missed me by inches and smashed into a signpost at the other side of the intersection. Good job the impact caused his engine to cut out at that very moment.

Of course, it's not just drivers. Only a couple of months ago I was stopped at a red light and was attacked by a punch-throwing yobbo on foot. Yeah, I reported him to the cops too, but unfortunately, pedestrians don't have number plates. Then, of course, there are the projectile hurling morons, well, fortunately it's been a while since I encountered one of them (apart from the water pistol moron last year).

Yes, it's a crazy, f*cked up world we live in.

Chris L

I'm amazed you even bothered to speak to that moron, I would have just called the cops without even bothering to warn them.

randya

Did you or someone else get a license plate # and a good description of these guys and their car???

Prosody

Well, I'll have one Red Stripe for each of you. Glad you're ok. On my uneventful ride today I was thinking about calm ways to respond to sub-moron drivers. The after-ride Guiness ought to be for relaxing muscles, not the mind; the ride's supposed to do that.

Garlic

This happened to me a few years ago. The dumb kids were too busy messing with me to notice the police car behind them. Just one of lifes little victories that doesn't happen often enough.

bkrownd

Of course if there were no witnesses and you were hit and killed it would go in the books as an "accident", or maybe some lame "careless driving" charge, and they get off with a slap on the wrist. Just the price of being outside of the "mainstream" in the USA.

Bicyclists really stoke some people's sense of insecurity for some mysterious reason. I have relatives who can't resist flying into a tirade of lame insults as soon as they see a bicycle on the street, even if it isn't anywhere near them. (these same people couldn't pedal their way over a speedbump if they tried, hmmm....)

Patrick A

I didn't get the plate, but the guy on the porch did. We'll see what they can come up with. I honestly couldn't tell; we're on the state line of Missour and Kansas and in the flurry it was hard to see what state it was from.

Luckily the bike is alright - POS that it is but it's still my steed for riding to work. The cop that took the report seemed to think they'd 'run into them' sooner or later, but I don't think the pun was intended, lol. Anyhow, I put all the new junk on it and tuned her up for being a courageous little bike, lol.

That stout was a good idea, too lol. Thanks all for your concern.

madpogue 

Well, that's a helluva lot better than most plate ID's. In most cases, people get just a few characters of the plate number. That usually translates to thousands of possible values, narrowed down by make and model to tens of possiblities. In your case, you've got only two possibilities. One will match the make and model, the other won't.

Chris L

One word: "Bigotry".

NZLcyclist

Let me get this straight....you kinda bunny hopped over the car? you utter legend.. Matrix style indeed! Glad you are ok. I have heard of a messenger here in Auckland bunny hopping the front of a car.....

slvoid

No one can read that fast heh.

Seanholio

Only every time I read one of these posts. Most of what I get are people who just don't understand that I need space, and that they shouldn't pass when there isn't enough space. And, yes, Chris, I take the whole lane in situations like this.

I'd really like a rock that also has a homing beacon in it, so that I can track the perp down and do something illegal.

TeleJohn

Fill an old waterbottle with concrete. Fits in your bottle cage.

Chris L

That would mean physically carrying the brick everytime you ride. I, for one, can't be bothered. Then of course, there is the "try it, punk" crowd, who would only be egged on by such a sign.

slvoid

If I were gonna run you over at 90mph, I don't think I'll have time to read that sign.

slvoid

Small squirt bottle of paint. ID's the car for the cops.

seely

DOT Brake Fluid is even more fun!!!

jeff williams

Originally Posted by slvoidSmall squirt bottle of paint. ID's the car for the cops.


DOT Brake Fluid is even more fun!!!


It happened to me as a young adult skateboarding, head-on including crossing the center lane.
An ADULT - well, compared to my 19 yrs @ the time.

To the above posts, best use foe\for the crescent wrench yet. Carried one in the back pocket for years after.

Hey, bro...don't worry, the deranged driver missed you. That kind of stuff is not personal> bike or no, you crossed paths with a sick\ violent animal, and lived.

H_Roark

Where in KC did this happen?